Since I came back from England It's like i've been leaving of memories and haven't quite fitted home yet, and there's been 7 months since. In this period of time I have been working and in the last month I got a really good internship in a world famous company. But even so I just think of how much I want to leave, not because I don't like Portugal, just because I've been feeling unhappy. Plus I've also been consedering moving to Amesterdam. The thing is, now with this intership, I'm not getting paid so I can't even have enough money to do it. Sometimes I just wanted to give it all away, go to Amesterdam find a job wherever and be there with my love. That's when all my fears and questions stop me: Where would I live? Would I be able to find a job? would I have enough money?
I know I probably just need to wait and see what happens after the internship (6 months), I just can't stand this feeling anymore...
"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope ans future." Jeremiah 29-11 (this has been great confort).
Did you ever feel like this? what did you do?
" 'if only...' feelings can distort our personalities, and give us an obsession which can only lead to more and more dissatisfaction, as well as making us into 'Eeyhore-ish' and unconfortable-to-be-with people." [edith schaeffer]
ReplyDeleteacho que a chave é vivermos no presente e do our best and be thankful, mesmo que sonhemos com o futuro. ;)
I feel like this all the time. I recently moved across the country with my boyfriend and now I'm losing my job thanks to the company declaring bankruptcy. I'm stuck where I am and some days I just want to cry because I'm so scared. But something always comes out of these dark times. I want to move to Amsterdam too! But I have to wait 2 1/2 years until my boyfriend is done with his master's degree. I just hope I can wait that long. I know you'll get through this!
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for your words Sara. :)
ReplyDeleteM.M.E. I feel you... I hope things get easier for you and that you find some comfort. Like I said Jeremiah 29-11 is a light that keeps me going, maybe you´ll find some comfort in it to. :)
About 9 years ago I was planning on moving to England as well. I had just finished my degree, was working for 2 years but having come out of a bad and abusive relationship all I wanted was to leave everything behind and start from scratch. Sent my resume, applied for a number of jobs but they never got back at me. About a month after I started planning this I met a guy... Today we have been living together for 7 years and have a beuatiful baby girl 17 months old ;). There IS a plan in our lives. We just need to be patient and learn the value of time. Be calm. Never stop looking for jobs and opportunities in Amsterdam if that is what you desire. In the meantime, enjoy your internship for the months to come and the presence of your friends around you! You will be ok!
ReplyDeleteTo be honest, when I first read this I didn't know how to respond because I am still going through this myself. And perhaps that's what makes these situations a little more bearable, i.e. people coming forward and letting you know that you're not alone in your feelings. I think there is some comfort in knowing that you and other people are sharing a common experience. It makes you feel less isolated.
ReplyDeleteI pray the Lord holds you close in His love.
:-( I too have this feeling of wanting to move away. Just like you, it's not because I don't LIKE it here because it's my home and my family. It's just I feel unhappy. If I were to move maybe it would be the same I don't know. I'm just waiting for an opportunity to arise, almost like a sign that it would be good for me.
ReplyDeleteHope you feel better soon!
Just stopped by from FTLOB :-) Take care!
I have had those feelings. I plug in my uv light and ride the storm. Hugs hang in there.
ReplyDeleteIt's good to know that we are not alone. Thank you so much to you all for the kind words of advice it means a lot, :)
ReplyDelete