Can't believe it's September again, seriously? Summer is not over yet but the weather says otherwise and looking through my bedroom window I feel like a part of me just left. I keep thinking it's not fair that we mainly only have two good months of summer and then the rest is dark and blurry! I'm not excited at all for the upcoming season don't want to give up my summer shorts and of course summer friends.
Actually I think that the problem are all the good memories from this summer that are still so much in me it's kind of hard to let go. The same happen last year and I know it will get better sooner or later, but what's really bothering me is why do I have to go through all the same stuff again? the same feelings, the same pain?
Is there any way I can shut myself and keep on going without having this feelings all again?
I'm in that fase where I have to look for a job again! I was exactly at the same point last year: just finished having the greatest holidays with friends, recently arrived from England, thus missing everyone, and having to look for a job, oh and no boyfriend! I'm exactly at the same fase right now! Is this deja vu? 1 year and nothing changed?
Next week I'm gonna be away for a conference not actually to assist it but to take care of the kids while the parents assist it. There will be probably just a few kids 5 or 6 tops. I am not very excited about it. Firstly I feel like I'm delaying life when I could be looking for work. Secondly I have some little job to do for a friend of mine and this means delaying it. Plus none of my friends are actually going or people from my age. Yes I know, look at the bright side. The place is actually nice and doing that instead of being at home despairing looks way better. Well I hope so! I do love kids and don't mind helping at all but once again I did the exact same thing last year!
Other part of me is also sad because well there's this boy... and I couldn't tell him how I felt and I don't know how he feels about me, us... (I feel ridiculous even writing about it) I'm regretting not being more bold and go for it. The worst part is that he left. He's not from here and we mainly see each other during summer. I think he's really special and don't know what to do, don't want to be ruining our friendship... :S
Reading trough all I just wrote feels like I'm being a bit dramatic, lol, well maybe I am. Aren't we all? Oh well...
What about you? have any feeling you would like to share?
***Rita***
Rita, go 4 it...He might feel the same...??seriously, you should take a chance...
ReplyDeleteR.Henry
Ahahah this is quite "funny", thank you Raquel I might! :)
ReplyDeletehello! glad u like the pictures i post! I always write where i take the pictures from, right under the last image. I almost alway link to the blog as well to make it easier to visit the blog! :)
ReplyDeletehave a nice day! :)
You are in a hard season, but I am sure that everything will be settled in time. Maybe you just haven't find yourself, maybe changed a lot this year and can't find yourself anymore. See the bright side of the hassle, it might be your chance to change and try out something new! New things are always scary, but they help you to focus on yourself and be done with important things in your life. I know you have already lived through these changes, I just wrote down my current thoughts :)
ReplyDeleteActually it's nearly the same with me, I am doing everything again from nearly the beginning which had happened two years ago: new city, new accommodation, new people, very new school: university, new big projects/challenges, no boyfriend... etc. everything new :S But I'm trying to push myself into it, to make the hard start easier :) good luck for you, and sorry for talking too much! xxx
Oh I'm feeling exactly the same way about autumn coming. I'm kind excited about the season changing because that always brings something new into your life... but I'm not excited about the cold / darkness. Hang in there darling girl :)
ReplyDeletePs. I think you should let the boy know how you feel :) He might be feeling exactly the same way!
xxx mervi
it IS difficult when we see time pass and find ourselves in what seems the exact same place. but something does change, we do. we shift, even if imperceptibly.
ReplyDeletedive into life, and you'll freak out at the changes that come your way. :)
Ah, when can we be dramatic if not on our blogs?
ReplyDeleteRight now, I'm sat at the airport waiting for the plane to take me to London. It'll be a fresh start in a new city, with (nearly) no friends, definitely no boyfriend. I'm a bit worried!! Though, I think fresh starts are good for us all. We'll get through it, and suddenly life looks completely different.
Good luck to you!!
I really feel much of the same thing you do. The fall is approaching really quickly and I don't want it to. Especially because the winter days here in Norway are so dark and short. I get depressed just thinking about it. Also I sort of feel my life is on hold... I've been studying for 8 years and been in a long distance relationship in 6 years... I really feel like changing that. But fortunately I know that I soon will :) I hope you are well now, and I'm quite sure things will figure it out. (The best thing I can do is to relax about it and let it be:)
ReplyDeleteStill the same old question. That is the funny part about the human being. We never know what to do. We try to do it our own way but still people surprise us (or not) :) And some times we mess up and everything looks like a garbage can.
ReplyDeleteIf you think that it will ruin your friendship just don´t do it. Remember the past knowing that it will be a lesson for the future. If you mess things up you will regret and look to the past and think: "Why didn´t i kept my good old friend? Why wasn´t I thankfull for what i had?"
But if you are confident go forward girl and get the guy :) Were is he from?
Vivi P.
When I lived in New York I used to DREAD September. The only good thing about winter season was all the reading I did because I never left the house.
ReplyDelete